


Seven Phone Calls and a Message

by akainagi



Category: Fullmetal Alchemist
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-11-25
Updated: 2012-11-25
Packaged: 2017-11-19 11:40:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 489
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/572868
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/akainagi/pseuds/akainagi
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Just some cracky fun.  I don't even think they have answering machines in Amestris.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Seven Phone Calls and a Message

_You have … seven … new messages._

_Message one. July twenty-fourth. One fifty-nine PM._

_Beeeeeep._

“Yeah. It’s me. I’m gonna be late. Damn good and late. Something busted on something somewhere and now we’re all stuck on a train in the middle of nowhere in 99 degree weather, and this wouldn’t be happening if hadn’t sent me on one of your pissy little errands. You owe me, you bastard.”

_Message two. July twenty- fourth. Two twenty-five PM._

_Beeeeeep._

“Roy, it’s Hughes. My lovely Gracia wants to know when you two are going to be over for dinner again. How about this weekend? You have to come and hear the new song Elysia learned in preschool today! It goes something like this –“

_Message deleted. Next message._

_Message three. July twenty-fourth. Three fifteen PM._

_Beeeeeep._

“Colonel Mustang. Lieutenant Hawkeye. I’m calling to remind you of the very large stack of forms that is currently on your desk waiting for your review and signature-“

_Message deleted. Next message._

_Message four. July twenty-fourth. Three sixteen PM._

_Beeeeeep._

“That are due by noon tomorrow. I also wish to remind you of the staff meeting at 0830 tommorow morning-“

_Message deleted. Next message._

_Message five. July twenty-fourth. Three seventeen PM._

_Beeeeeep._

“If both are not attended to in a timely fashion, I will be forced to shoot you. That is all.” 

_Message Deleted. Next message._

_Message six. July twenty-fourth. Five thirty-two PM._

_Beeeeeep._

“It’s me. I should be in sometime between nine and ten, that is if nothing else on this heap breaks. If I hadn’t transmuted a new part for them, we’d still be suck in the middle of fucking nowhere. You owe me, you bastard.

_Message seven. July twenty-fourth. Six twelve PM._

_Beeeeeep._

“Hi Roy honey. It’s Candy. I haven’t heard from you in months. I miss you sooo-“

_Message Deleted._

_End of new messages._

…

“Somebody’s popular. What’s with the tramp?”

The slightly peeved tone of Ed’s voice made Roy smirk. He turned to the short blond who stood, arms crossed, in the middle of his living room. “She’s was actually a very nice girl.”

“Her name is Candy,” Ed replied dubiously. “Your taste sucked.” The use of the past tense was blatantly deliberate. Roy found it charming.

“You’re being awfully insulting after I spent all day waiting at the station for you.”

“Fuck you,” Ed replied conversationally. “At least the station was air-conditioned. Have you ever spent three hours in the blistering heat in a train car with twenty other people? I don’t think my nose’ll ever recover.”

Roy broke out in a rare, genuine grin. “I thought you smelled a little ripe.”

“Fuck you again.” Ed stalked over, grabbed him by the front of his uniform shirt, and began leading him across the room. “Shower,” he ordered.

Roy followed with amusement tinged with anticipation. “I don’t need one.”

“Yes, but I do. And I did say you owe me. Time to pay up.”


End file.
